:)

follow me at click click click !!!! :D

realising.

i just realise that i am much more happier.

after seeing things another way round.

booooo you who tried to ruin my life.

i am much more stronger and happier now.

proud to be.

=D

in my case.
it would be saying something and wishing i had not.
thanks for making me hate myself.

Thanks for making this decision.


a step of being selfish.


it hurts.


i still cant accept the fact that.


things changes as time flies.


people changes this i could not agree more.


people do change so its something we can do nothing about.


i accept every flaws just because no one is perfect.


you have to learn to accept other's just because people have been accepting urs.


seeing it as some elimination round going on.


this doesnt stop me from thinking that when ll it be my turn.


it freaks me out as much but this is part of life.


sometimes we just have to get out of our comfort zone and start living it at own.


sometimes we should just take a deep breath and have a little silent moment and step out from everything.


sometimes we should have some time left alone .


sometimes its not about who we know longer but who we really can trust.


sometimes knowing someone long enough doesnt mean that its worth trusting.


sometimes i just worry too much that i ended up having to keep everything to myself.


sometimes this could just make me crazy for not being to voice out.


sometimes i just think that i am too weak. too weak to go through all this .


sometimes. i often wondered why does the same thing kept happening to me over and over again.


sometimes i pretended so much that i dont even care but its killing me to ask or know.


sometimes i think its time to stop worrying over all kinds of shit.


this is life. no matter how awful it is. or how wonderful it is. we have to go through it.


sometimes, people doesnt know someone enough to judge them.


so stop judging because i bet no one know well enough to judge.


i kept too much to myself. :)


i am just me being emo at times. so many things going through the brain at the same time.

the more i know

the more i know..

the more disappointed i am .

for what i see was not what you really are.

i really feel bad for finding out even more.

if i knew i would judge you like this.

anyways..

i cant disagree that i seriously have some confidence issues here...

not pretty , too short, too fat.


just one of those random days that i hate everything about myself.


have to learn to love myself !!!

:(

i know..

you dont have to hide.

i know you were here.

i know who is watching. 

anyways , life has been pretty boring with only 3 classes per week.


new semester started a week ago..


never spotted any cute or hot hunks pffft


have been repeating the routine of waking up,eat,online and sleeep.


that explain the gaining of weight !!! 


not to forget about all the shopping spree =)


officially broke now.


and ooh i am on diet now =(


just cant resist nice food infront of me. so everytime i cant resist. i would just drink water and look away.


=(


andddd !!! i must grow taller i must find a way i dont care !!!


sorry for the random updates with random things =D 


cse i am random like that !! =)

it hurts because i trust.

i knew it that for giving the 1st chance.


there will be a second attempt.


i dont know why i trusted you so much.


i feel as much guilty that i did that behind your back.


but then for knowing the truth it seriously kill me.


bitching behind others was never a thing to proud of.


but you take it to a second stage where you betray your friend. for i dont know what you call it.


drama queeen? attention whore much?


i am just plain stupid that i give all my trust to you when i knew there is something not right about this.


but no i am not gona shoot you down straight infront of your face.


instead  i am sit back and relax and see how much drama you can create.


and  oh  you are nothing different from her.


i thought you could be trusted at the 1st place and i still keep my trust afterall .


you say you wouldnt say anything bad behind me and all those are just lies.


i am sure you guys could make a good partner in crime.


and.


when i said i move on . i am so sure of it. what would i wana put up an act. who do you think you are.


you guys are just a bunch of big bad liars. 


that seriously break my heart for trusting so much.


you should just think before you do anything.


what if you are in my place? 


i am truly disappointed.


i cant help but to ask myself if there is any non two faced people left in this world.


i am just so sick of all this and wonder if there is anyone that is true to me.

p/s: Dont try to guess who i am talking about, you might be wrong., just because my world is full of dramatic people.it might be old it might be recent.it might be idk =/. ask me if u want to know. =P


and oh i am not pointing fingers at anyone too here. its just too disappointing and i have no one to share with. so i shall rant hereeeee :) 

the happppppy post. =D

Being as random as i am .


i am gona gather a few smileys pictures.


because a smile can just easily make my day.


a sincere one of course :)


so put on ur smileeee everyone .


use your face muscle so that you can get a slimmer face !!!!


ok. its actually because of what my friend say.


she say i shall brighten up my blog with some happy post and i cant agree much. =)

for me. nothing is better than a smile showing my teeeth!!! i think i need to "polish" my teeth till it blings!!


oohh.. my friend say my face is getting longer. due to showing my teeth too much maybe? LOl

kohchingyee ♥ showing her teeeth without being force !! so rare !! :)

That's the way !! show me moreeee teeeeeth !! =D

Best teeeeeth showing partner !! berrrrry ♥

last but not least the winner goes to =D
if i did not update my blog few days later. all of you would know that i might be killed . by someone up there  =D

there is actually much more pictures that i wanted to post.. but i am just too lazy =P


begging for forgivenessss !!! ppuuhhleeezzz =D


p/s: i am using darlie now =P

life as it goes on.

what to let go when there is none.

it always ended up with disappointment when you expect something .


that is why i stop expecting since long ago.


but i always ask myself. why cant people be honest and be their true self.


its pathetic when even people that you trusted alot bitch behind you.


and all you thought is. she wont dont that to me . i know her. i can trust her.


i have been going through this issue for like ages ago.


and it just seems that its hunting me. not going away from me.


trusting people is what i always do.


trusting the wrong people is what i did wrong but there is no one to be blame.


but what would i not learn . that's the problem.


Life's not about the people who act true to your face. It's about the people who remain true behind your back.


this is one of the quote that i cant deny that it is so true.


trust is nothing nowadays.


secrets arent secrets when u told someone about it because it just so hard that it wont be spread out.


i have my own inner darkest secrets i can say that no one knows . =)


but that doesnt mean that i have no one to trust. i have a few darlings that i know i can trust. because i do.


 if you know me well. you knew secrets remain secrets to me. =)


for an instance ..


i was thinking . we only live once. so its better for me to put up a smile and live on. 


no matter if its a sincere one or a fake one . it doesnt matter.


=)


p/s: its just some flashback that makes me blog about this. :)

daddy ♥

i wish there is a chance that daddy will hold my hand

sometimes i say i hate you but i know i didnt mean it.


sometimes i just keep quiet its because i have too much to say but i dont know which to say.


sometimes i am just being shy.


sometimes i dont know what happen that now we are like this.


sometimes i just wish that i can tell you i love you.


sometimes i wish that you can read my mind..


sometimes i wish that you know that i am always guilty.


sometimes i am so afraid that i ll regret one day for not telling you everything that i have wanted to.


sometimes i cant help but to cry in bed when you talk about death because i am afraid that i will lose you.


sometimes i dont mean to say things like that.


somtimes i just wonder why we did not take any pictures anymore.


i am just so sad that growing up, i didnt have a single photo with my dad since 7 years.


i know i am like the worst daughter anyone could have.


the way i treated you. its not what i wanted to do. but it just came out like that.


i dont know why. maybe i am not the kind who would show how i feel.


but inside my heart, you are the best dad ever !! =)


i just wana tell you, i love you daddy.


too bad he wont know =/

how beautiful can the sunrise be.

i am happy that its another brand new day every morning when i open my eyes.


i am glad that i live for another day for who knows what will happen the next minute.


this is why i am gona appreciate life and every single thing now.


no matter its a good thing or a bad thing. 


for i know there is always be people that i love around me.


Life has never been better.


life back home is much more better.


i am glad that i am back to the used to be always happy self now =)


i am truly glad that how i know all these wonderful people that god bring into my life .


its all fate.


 am so gona appreciate every single one. =)


now here comes one of the song that i am addicted to nowadays. if i die young by The Band Perry =D

if i die young bury me in satin

lay me down on a bed of roses

sink me in the river at dawn

send me away with the words of a love song

ooh ooh ooh ooh

lord make me a rainbow I'll shine down on my mother

she'll know I'm safe with you and she stands under my colors

oh and life ain't always what you think it ought to be

no ain't even gray but she buries her baby

the sharp knife of a short life

well I've had just enough time

if i die young bury me in satin

lay me down on a bed of roses

sink me in the river at dawn

send me away with the words of a love song

the sharp knife of a short life

well, i have just enough time

and I'll be wearing white

when i come into your kingdom

I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger

I've never known the lovin' of man

but it sure felt nice when he was holdin' my hand

there's a boy here in town

who says he'll love me forever

who would have thought forever could be severed

by the sharp knife of a short life

well I've had just enough time

so put on your best boys, and I'll wear my pearls

what i never did is done

a penny for my thoughts oh no I'll sell 'em for a dollar

they're worth so much more after I'm a goner

and maybe then you'll hear the words that I've been singin'

its funny when your dead how people start listenin'

if i die young bury me in satin

lay me down on a bed of roses

sink me in the river at dawn

send me away with the words of a love song

ooh ooh the ballad of a dove

go with peace and love

gather up your tears and keep them in your pocket

save em for a time when your really gonna need em.

oh the sharp knife of a short life

well I've had just enough time

so put on your best boys, and I'll wear my pearls